I'm sure he'll pull a dead cat out of somewhere!’

Our man Finn calls has the RSPCA on speed-dial

I think we've all seen our share of false dawns at THFC, and it was a very tepid United team. But despite that, there were some signs that offer at least a smidgen of hope.

Udogie, Bissouma, and Sarr looked good; in fact, the team looked like they'd played together before which is an improvement on last term. Defence is not bad but neither Porro nor Emer…